Impersonal se with a dative experiencer

Compare two sentences. Spavam. means "I am sleeping" — you are doing it. Spava mi se. means "I feel like sleeping" or "I'm sleepy" — you are not doing it at all, you only have the urge. Serbian expresses this urge with one of the commonest patterns in everyday speech: the verb plus se, and the person who feels the urge in the dative.

How it is built

• The verb is always in the third person singular: spava, ide, jede, radi. It never changes for the person.
• The person who feels like it stands in the dative, normally as a clitic: mi, ti, mu, joj, nam, vam, im — or as a full noun: Ani, deci.
• se is always there, and it never changes either.
• There is no subject at all. Nobody is "doing" the sleeping — it is something that happens to you, like sviđa mi se.

Both clitics go in second position, and the dative clitic always comes before se: mi se, never se mi. So Spava mi se or, with something in front, Danas mi se spava.

The trap: English "I" pushes you to write spavam mi se or ja se spava. Do neither. Find the person, put them in the dative, and leave the verb in the form spava — the form you would use for "he sleeps". If you catch yourself changing the verb ending, you have left the construction.

Saying you don't feel like it

Put ne directly in front of the verb, as with any verb. When ne begins the sentence, the clitics follow the verb: Ne ide mi se napolje. (I don't feel like going out.) With a word in front, the clitics come right after it and ne stays with the verb: Danas mi se ne radi. (I don't feel like working today.)

In the past

Since there is no subject, the past participle has nothing to agree with, so it takes the neuter singular in -lo: spavalo, išlo, jelo, radilo. The clitic je that the perfect normally needs is dropped after se. A woman, a man and a whole group all say the same participle:

In the negative past nije opens the clause and the clitics come straight after it: Nije mi se išlo. Juče nam se nije radilo.

Asking

Ask with da li or with a question word, followed by the dative clitic, se and the verb: Da li ti se spava? (Are you sleepy?), Šta ti se radi večeras? (What do you feel like doing tonight?), Kuda vam se ide? (Where do you feel like going?). You can also put li after the verb: Spava li ti se?

Which verbs do it

The pattern lives on everyday activities and bodily urges: spavati (sleep), ići (go), izlaziti (go out), raditi (work, do), jesti (eat), piti (drink), plakati (cry), pričati (talk), šetati (go for a walk), učiti (study), ustajati (get up), zevati (yawn). Learn it from these; do not build it on any verb you like — many verbs simply do not take it.

A place or a goal attaches as usual: Ide mi se kući (I feel like going home), Ne izlazi mi se po kiši (I don't feel like going out in the rain). A vague nešto fits straight in: Jede mi se nešto slatko (I feel like something sweet). With a specific thing, that thing becomes the subject and the verb agrees with it — Pije mi se kafa, Jedu mi se palačinke — which is a step beyond this lesson; until then, Hoću kafu does the same job.